People pay a lot for sports tickets these days, and with that price tag comes the value of being entertained by those well rounded juiced-up athletes. Take baseball: Beer is $12.  A hot dog chimes in at $8. (BURP!) Parking your ride will be anywhere from $15 to $25, and you are surrounded by loud drunken fanatics that love to yell in anger rather than cheer.  Pretty fucking depressing if you ask me.  It has been as exciting as golf with multiple crotch rubbing and tobacco spitting.

So I ponder: Do we really need to see players getting paid millions of dollars to sit down after standing around waiting for a ball to get hit their way?

This year’s playoffs in the American League was the biggest no-show of offense I have ever witnessed.  Yes, I am a Yankee fan…  Last time I checked, to win a game, you must hit the ball damnit!  So as spectators and paid attendees, we must ask ourselves the million dollar question: Is watching a pitcher put away an entire team with pitches more exciting than a team that smacks the ball hard, runs, slides, and tackles to home plate for a notch on the scoreboard?  Obviously, I would say the latter, but by the looks of it, baseball has just gotten too damn dull and boring, and they want us to pay through the nose for watching it!  Face it, the only fun part of going to a baseball game is waiting for a shot at catching a foul ball, and then you have to deal with a bunch of fat drunks that will crush you’re every move.

Take soccer- a lot like basketball but bigger and grander, and never a dull moment.  I once watched a local newscaster bashing the sport because he felt that a 1-0 final score just wasn’t action-packed enough for his taste in numbers.  He is a clueless idiot and should not be allowed to judge a sport by gauging a game by the way the score looks.  FACT: Soccer is the world’s most popular sport, and it is slowly pacing heavily in popularity with the young generation, and is also widely upheld amongst milfy soccer-moms !  Like tennis and basketball, watching women play is just as glamorous and exciting.

So will soccer replace baseball? 

As long as Americans stay lazy and look forward to bathroom breaks and commercials, I am afraid not, but if you look around lately, people are getting more health conscious, and are starting to pay attention to the interests of the rest of the world, so I really believe there’s hope for the most amazing sport in the world.  In 2 years, USA will have another chance at the amazing FIFA World Cup, so it should get pretty exciting for us clueless Americans!

Oh…  and as far as being a spectator, you can still look forward to loud obnoxious fans, heavy beer drinking, and pricey seats, but you will be getting your bottom dollar in non-stop action, injuries, and amazing athletic feats as you’ll see clever passing, shooting, and tackling by the minute!

Me- I’m done with baseball!  You pay an athlete $30 million a year to hit a ball with a stick, and he and his team of mashups fail miserably at every opportunity as you spend your hard earn dollars watching and waiting for that contact shot!  Oh…wait…     awwwww….     it’s a foul ball… Wake up America!   Try watching some SOCCER, it’s an amazing SPORT!!!